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The Career Song:
I started in Initiate, working for the church But I wanted to learn Silent Move and wanted to learn Search I stumbled on a poor box, labelled “War Relief” I took the cash, spent some XP and switched over to Thief
I joined a band of footpads, working on the streets I soon became an Alley Cat, and my footedness got fleet But I wanted up my Fellowship, and learn the thieving brogue So I conned a priest, spent XP and changed across to Rogue
As a Rogue I learnt to gamble, and owned a pair of dice But the money was too meagre, and the company not nice So I moved up to a Charlatan, waving good bye to the rats, Once I’d made myself a fake degree, and purchased d10 hats.
I’m a character in Warhammer, reprobate and rake I like to raise my stats up and I don’t care what it takes I’m a character in Warhammer, take a look at me If it’s got a skill I want to learn, then that’s the job for me
As a charlatan I made a mint selling hair cures to the bald But the skill list didn’t interest me and my stat advances stalled So when the hairless lords of Altdorf put a bounty out on me I became at once both Bodyguard, and body-guarded-ee.
As Bodyguard I learnt Dodge Blow, a very useful skill And my Toughness and my wounds went up, so I was much harder to kill. I craved a life of violence so got Specialist Weapon (Fist) Then got paid for starting bar fights as a Protagonist.
In this career I found myself often smacked upon the head And if it wasn’t for my Fate points, I’d probably be dead For safety I donned some chain mail which I’d managed to “acquire” And convinced a drunk and stupid knight to take me as his Squire
As a Squire I soon was master of the flail and demi-lance And we marched off to Bretonnia, to fight in pseudo-France It was here I met a princess with a very shapely ass I bedded her, then wedded her and joined the Noble class.
I’m a character in Warhammer, my fortunes rise and fall There’s no trade that I’ve mastered, but I’m jack of almost all I’m a character in Warhammer, my stats are getting maxed My Weapon Skill is sixty, and I’ll soon have three attacks!
As a Nobleman, I gained some skills for a better sort of life Took Etiquette so when dining, I could use the correct knife But there were combat skills still out there that my XP could afford So I tried my hand at Duellist, then went on to Noble Lord
As a Noble Lord I was given my own army by the Graf I sent them to the Chaos Wastes, cos I thought it’d be a laugh They all came back mutated, spread their poison to my flesh And now I am a Flagellant, taking orders from Slaanesh!
_________________ Barbarism is the natural state of mankind. Civilization is unnatural. It is a whim of circumstance. And barbarism must ultimately triumph.
Naposledy upravil Corvus dňa Ut. 21. Nov 2006, 16:28, celkovo upravené 1 krát.
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